


Smosh Summer Games: Seven Seas

by Anonymous



Category: Smosh
Genre: Gen, Smosh Summer Games, also i just wanted to write some keith cause i love him, i just did this as an excuse to make bad puns, my first attempt at writing something realistic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-11
Updated: 2019-10-11
Packaged: 2020-12-09 05:44:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20989808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: In the latest Smosh Summer Games, the squad are tackling a vaguely pirate themed game of paintball. Very vaguely. Matt Raub isn't that creative.Keith is on the opposite team to Wes, so he is nervous, but he needs to carry his team to victory.





	Smosh Summer Games: Seven Seas

**Author's Note:**

> Another request! Sorry this took a while, but it was my first go at writing something realistic! I hope you enjoy!
> 
> (Also I'll add tags later, but I'm on mobile right now so it's tricky)

"This is stupid," Keith complained, sliding a protective vest over his torso. 

Noah laughed, and handed him a helmet. "You're just saying that because Wes isn't on your team and you know you're going to lose."

"Yeah, that's exactly why I'm saying that!" Sulking, Keith took the helmet and placed it on his head. It muffled his voice when he said "Why are we even playing paintball anyway? How does that fit in with the theme?"

"Pirates love paintballing, obviously." At that, Noah left the room with a smirk, leaving Keith to pull on the rest of his gear alone. Everyone else was already outside when he finished - the Yo Ho Hoes in green and Keith's team, the Soulmateys, in purple. As he went to join his team, Joven handed him a paintball gun, his face showing the dread he had for the game ahead.

He was right to be worried. The Soulmateys were behind by one point, and with only two games left, it was crucial that they won both of them. Joven had won MVP the previous year, but he still had a lingering suspicion that it would be a Most Epic Fail trophy that got added to his mantlepiece if he didn't push his team to victory. 

Meanwhile, the other team looked incredibly smug, and why shouldn't they? They had Wes, paintballing master (and professional cheat). They also had Mari, whose dance background gave her incredible agility and stamina. Courtney put her arm around Mari's shoulders. She was athletic too, as were Damien and Shayne, who stood beside her. The rest of Keith's team perceived Noah as the weak link in this challenge, but he disagreed. He knew how quick and observant Noah was, and recognised him as a force to be reckoned with in this game.

He looked at his own team, and sighed. Joven may have won MVP last year, but consistency wasn't his strong suit when it came to Summer Games. Lasercorn had been a powerful force in previous games, but last year's loss had left him feeling more downtrodden than usual, though he wouldn't admit it. Ian would probably try and shoot backwards again, to make up for his epic fail earlier in the games during the Punishment Shootout. Keith didn't see himself as much of a competitor, which left Kimmy and Olivia to carry the entire team through it.

We're screwed, Keith thought as he surveyed the scene.

The teams didn't have time to discuss strategy before Matt Raub was shouting demands at them, urging them to take their places at opposite ends of the field. When everyone was ready, Sarah used a klaxon to start the game.

At that sound, everyone immediately ducked behind the nearest obstacles. Keith felt the box he was leaning on shudder as it was bombarded with paintballs, stopping him from moving from his position. 

Soon, the onslaught subsided. Keith peeked cautiously at his enemy. It appeared that they all needed to reload at the same time, giving an opening for his team to make some progress. Keeping his head down, he began to fire haphazardly in front of him. Looking behind him, he saw that much of his team was doing the same. Except for Olivia.

Olivia had emerged from behind her defence, and was attempting to move closer to the Yo Ho Hoes. Her path was clear. She could see the wall right in front of her. All she had to do was move quickly and hide. 

She wasn't quick enough. A well timed paintball connected with her shoulder, knocking her back and turning her protective vest from black to green. Cheers erupted from the enemy camp as Olivia left the field.

"Damn it," Keith muttered. One of the best players had gone, leaving him to help pick up the pieces she had left. Around him, his teammates expressed similar feelings of dismay with a series of groans and curses.

"Ow!" He checked around him for the voice, but saw that everyone else on his team was safe. The cry had come from the other team. Keith thought that red was probably a bad colour of paint to choose, as Shayne staggered away, looking like he was bleeding.

"YEEEEEEEEEES! Joven cheered, jumping up from behind a barrier. "MVP! MVP!" His victory dance, whilst wonderful, was also incredibly short-lived, as a paintball smacked him in the cheek. Everyone winced, except Matt Raub, who was doubled over with laughter. Joven sulked, and began to stomp his way off the field, but not before firing one last shot at the enemy team. It clipped Wes' thigh and decorated his shorts with red splatters.

"Cheater!" Wes yelled (which was a bold accusation coming from him). The referees nodded.

"Just for that, Kimmy's coming off too!" Matt Raub announced, rubbing his hands together like a villain concocting a plot. Despite their complaints, the Soulmateys were left with just three team members.

This may have discouraged other people, but Keith was determined to win. He spotted his target - Noah's ankle ever so slightly poking out from behind a box. Keith kept as much of his body behind the barrier as he could, trying to angle the gun towards Noah without making himself an obvious target. He put his head down when he fired, but from the loud "Ow!" He knew he'd hit his target.

Keith couldn't let his success distract him - just look what happened to Joven. He had to focus. Cautiously, he edged away from the barrier, just enough that he could peer around at the enemy. He couldn't see anyone yet, but if he were a bit further right, maybe he would be able to hit someone.

It just so happened that there was a crate to his right, sturdy and large enough to hide his whole body, but the distance between him and the crate was definitely far enough for him to get hit. He decided it was worth the risk and prepared to make a move.

The firing calmed down slightly - at least, it was enough to give him a fighting chance to get past. Using all the strength in his legs, he propelled himself forward in the largest jump he could manage. He imagined himself looking majestic, like an athlete as he pulled off that move, when in reality he looked like a bit of a weird frog really. Still it got the job done, but he got a bit too close for comfort with a paintball that Courtney fired at him. Fortunately, it didn't fit him, but unfortunately, it hit his teammate, Lasercorn, across the stomach, soaking him in corrosive green.

"Just me and you now," Ian yelled, still cowering at the back of the field.

"Come on, move up!" Keith gestured with his hand for Ian to move closer. "You won't hit anything from back there!"

Ian sighed, and shuffled towards Keith at a snail's pace. Surprisingly, he managed to not get hit before he crouched down beside him. "Hey Keith," he said, his voice playful. Keith knew exactly what was going to happen. "Watch this."

Ian turned away from the enemy team, and aimed his gun behind him. Keith gave him vague directions of where to aim, but honestly, he didn't particularly want to look either. On the count of three, Ian repeatedly pulled the trigger, sending a flurry of paintballs flying out the barrel of the gun. 

"Alright, stop, you got me!" Damien emerged with his hands up in surrender. Mari followed him, red paint coating her back. Keith and Ian looked at each other in shock, then looked over the barrier at Damien and Mari. That was a mistake. Wes was waiting for them, and a paintball smacked Ian right in the face.

And then there was one. One against two. Keith against Courtney and Wes. Great.

He decided the 'Ian technique' might be worth a try. Not the firing backwards part, but the 'fire as much as possible and one of them will probably hit' part.

Apparently Ian knew what he was talking about. Soon, Courtney was out of the game. Now the game was even. Well, not exactly even, Wes had been playing paintball for years, and Keith had only played paintball on rare occasions. Still, at least there was only one other person, and that made him feel proud, no matter what the result. 

He decided to carry on with that technique, and started firing haphazardly in the general direction of Wes, until the gun refused to fire any more. The trigger became firmly stuck in its place. Keith was essentially unarmed. 

He looked down at the paintballs beside him. "I don't need a gun," he decided, potentially foolishly but definitely bravely. He grabbed a handful, and waited. Soon enough, Wes needed to reload. His time had come. 

With his arms full of paintballs, Keith stood up, leaving himself exposed, which Wes barely noticed, as he struggled to reload his gun. Keith ran towards him, holding his hands out in front of him. Wes pointed his gun at Keith, ready to fire, but it was too little too late, as Keith slammed the paintballs down on Wes' head. Red dripped through his hair and down his neck. It was silent for what felt like a very long time, before Sarah spoke up. 

"Wow, he's never getting that out of his hair."

Her words seemed to spark a reaction from the other players. Those in red scooped Keith up and held him aloft like an ancient Greek hero, whilst those in green looked at him with a bewildered facial expression. But this time, nobody questioned it when Joven began chanting.

"MVP! MVP!"


End file.
